Dating after 30 consolidating federal grad plus loans
We’re thrust into a huge group of like-minded people with similar goals, united by identical hardships, leaning on one another for support as we edge closer to graduation.
Whatever comes at us, we’re all in it together, and the relationships which bloom in this environment are often strong and vibrant—there are seemingly endless possibilities for finding “the one.” But then it ends. Suddenly, your only shared environment is a competitive, professional one that discourages openness.
Most people want to find a friend or a life partner, and to meet the dates who may fulfill this desire, many 50-somethings, about 80 percent in fact, do it the old-fashioned way — through friends or family. Dating after 40 or 50 means taking control of your love life, just like you do the rest of your life. Baggage bonding is when an early date shifts into deep conversation about some baggage you have in common. You start comparing your horrific ex-spouses or your crazy awful dates. Men know who and what they want, often better than we do. The last thing you want at 55 is to wake up in the morning with flashbacks to your days as a 20-something, right? His manners, his shirt, his smile, the way he talks about his kids. If he walks away from the date having shared too much or hasn’t learned about you, then there won't be a second date.
It means being kind to yourself and the men you meet. I have compiled a list of Dating Do’s and Don’ts exclusively for women like you. These are for the woman who is done repeating the same mistakes, and is ready to find her grown-up love story. It starts off innocently with a question like “So what happened with your marriage? Nothing positive can possibly come from this, sister. Yes, I know he said he was going to call you, I know you had a great date and want to see him again. That’s especially true of the grownup men that you’re dating. Unless you can talk with your dude about safe sex and the status of your relationship after intimacy, steer clear of the sack. Start off with the positive and try to stay in mode before you decide he’s not right for you.
More than 30 percent don’t even know where to begin and nearly 30 percent say they find it too stressful (think back to those sweaty palms and awkward conversations.) For more than 40 percent of respondents, other priorities are simply more important, and nearly one-quarter say it’s just too difficult to date when you’re 50-plus.
That’s true whether you’re 16 or 56, but more than 40 percent don’t believe there is anyone “out there” to date.
You’re around others who might not share your goals, ideals, and experiences, and who might not understand your struggles.
As to the “why” behind the lack of date-nights, nearly 60 percent say they don’t need a relationship to be happy.
But according to TODAY’s “This is 50” survey results, only 18 percent of single people in their 50s said they were dating.On the positive side, the age 50-plus daters seem to be pretty darn smart when choosing a date-mate.