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16-Sep-2015 22:02

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Single women are constantly told by people around them that they should find a husband.Even if they do not want one, they are relentlessly pointed out that their social value is low because they haven’t managed to snap a man.The whole cultural notion in Russia, Ukraine, and Belarus is: A woman’s happiness is in her family.She is not supposed to feel fulfilled making a career or pursuing her creative passions, but only once she is married with children.In a way, marriage to a foreigner is a step to a greater freedom, which allows a Russian or Ukrainian woman to escape this restrictive social structure and develop her abilities and talents, even though her primary motivation in seeking a partner abroad is to realize herself as a wife and a mother, and not to build a professional career.

A few months ago a TV researcher from the ABC production team wanted to know in her preparing for a talk show why Ukrainian women strive to marry Australians.

The cultural and social standard for women in Russia and Ukraine is to find a man to marry, and then bear children and take care of her family. Even if a woman is educated and has a great career, she feels deficient not having a husband, as she is living in a society that looks down upon unmarried women over a certain age.

Women are taught that anything goes to get a husband, and many believe that they have to hide their intelligence, talents, and abilities, and try not to earn too much money, or they will not find a husband or won’t be able to keep one, because he will feel insecure if she is smarter or earns more money than him.

I have been telling the same thing to reporters for already 15 years (my first interview to Cosmopolitan was in 1999) but somehow it seems that the answer to this question is still not crystal clear, or maybe my version doesn’t fit the official interpretation.

So, allow me to put it concisely once again, circa 2015.

Total males to females ratio is 86/100 in Russia and 85/100 in Ukraine.



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