Dating initial attraction last
This is the first study to examine the role of dispositional mindfulness in predicting initial romantic attraction.Every now and then I’ll have someone tell me that they are dating a very godly woman or man, but are not physically attracted to them, and they want to know if they should break up.That brings up another common dating question, continuing the theme from last week: How important is physical attraction when choosing a spouse? I say that because, in dating, physical attractiveness is often at or near the top of the list of what people are looking for.Some people won’t admit that it’s a major factor, because that might make them seem shallow.Women were more attracted to men higher in dispositional mindfulness, beyond the effects of physical attractiveness.Men were more attracted to women who were more physically attractive, but female mindfulness did not influence male initial attraction.But, it is likely still the first thing you consider when meeting someone and deciding whether you might be interested in dating them.
Initial romantic attraction has important implications for the development of romantic relationships.Much research demonstrates that physical attractiveness predicts initial romantic attraction.My answer is that they should absolutely break up, because clearly they do not yet have the spiritual maturity to be attracted to the things that God is attracted to (1 Samuel 16:7).Until it is possible to commit to cherishing that person for a lifetime, breaking up is the best option.
But it’s more an issue of their own spiritual maturity, not of their significant other’s physique.
I don’t say that to shame them, but I get the sense that as The Holy Spirit continues to conform us to Christ we will eventually see people as God does.