Friendship into dating
I know Boundless has a lot of articles about being buddies with the opposite sex and how you shouldn't be super close with your opposite sex friend unless your intentions are to date her.But I had a question on how to go about dating your best friend.I feel that in the end, we would eventually need to talk about our intentions because hanging out alone now may feel like a date to me because of my change in feelings, but to her it probably is "just friends hanging out" unless she secretly likes me, too. First, I like the idea of a dating relationship having some friendship history.If a dating/courtship relationship is anything, it should be an amazing friendship.One of those is what you’re now experiencing: Given enough shared time and enough shared emotional energy, it is virtually impossible for stronger feelings not to develop.That’s great if it happens to both at generally the same time, but when only one of you begins to "fall," the friendship is on an unavoidable track to change. But it won’t be nearly as difficult as saying anything and trying to stuff your feelings and emotions, especially when you’re around her. It wouldn’t be fair to either of you to if you didn’t.But when "buddy" feelings start giving way to deeper heart feelings, it is rare to ever go back to "buddies." I advise that you have "that" conversation with her. It could be that, as you mentioned, she has had the same thoughts and is favorable to the idea. It will be a little weird at first, but that will eventually smooth out when you both get used to the idea.
Trust me, there already is a relationship, and something significant is about to happen to it.
As I have told many readers who’ve asked, "But what do I say? She needs to know you simply can’t be close "buddies" anymore.
Here is the basic scenario: What if you have been long-time friends with a girl for three years and recently you started seeing her in a new light?
We already hang out either with a group or alone pretty often. And how do I find out how she feels without making it awkward?
By all means, though, it is past time to do something, and God wants to work it for everyone’s best and His glory.
You’ve already read our articles about opposite-sex buddies and why we caution singles to be very careful about them for a variety of reasons.