Heard about the time an Airbus had to dip at 34,000ft above Berkshire to avoid an UFO? Not particularly interested in the melting point of steel girders? Not everyone who smokes weed is an intolerable bore.
FYI, the guy in the photo isn't the person this story is based on Selling weed seems like an easy pay-day. Thing is, bad boys really are very hot (the distant prospect of only being able to speak to my boyfriend through a panel of glass gets me fucking fired up), so I can see why others might want to follow the same path as I did.
'I'll just buy an ounce and sell it in bits for a profit,' you think. 'This whole selling large amounts of class-B drugs thing is actually quite illegal,' you realise. Should I get my own name tattooed on my forearm so people know I'm hard? However, I wouldn't feel right endorsing doing such a thing without handing out some pointers, so here's everything you need to know about dating a weed dealer.
'It can't be that hard – that guy Dean from college used to do it, and he's fine, bar all the paranoia and debt and the fact he kept having to buy new phones.' So you do just that, and the money starts trickling in – you're making £2 on every ten bag. You go to Halfords and buy a new head unit on credit. 'Driving around in a hot-boxed car full of cash and multiple baggies of skunk maybe isn't idea. Being broke and in love can be a dangerous combination.
Other girls who've dated small-fry weed dealers with a complex.
Think of Bonnie and Clyde, perhaps the only mass murderers to be name-checked aspirationally by a pair of multi-millionaire musicians.There was probably something like this going on in my head when my boyfriend and I made our disastrous first foray into the British drugs trade.