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10-Feb-2015 18:41

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Are you willing to make friends with other couples together? How far are you willing to live from your family of origin, and how often do you need to see them? "; "Can I imagine myself with this person the rest of my life? " A person can be theoretically compatible with any number of individuals in the world. No amount of imagination or parental influence can prepare a person for the daily commitments of a marriage. Do we share the same views about debt, retirement and insurance? Abstinence, fidelity and a shared-faith commitment prior to marriage do not guarantee a lifelong commitment, either.

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I have modified them to be questions we should ask before engagement. With the help of trusted clergy or a trained counselor, men and women can ask questions that lead to deeper discernment. Would you change anything about the other person and why? What annoys you about each other's parents or siblings? Have we been completely honest with the other person about our previous relationships? They are important in relationships but do not function as a lifetime warranty of trust. Three years ago, I picked up a suggested list of questions that counselors should ask engaged couples.

Will you receive money from the other person's parents for help with a car or down payment on a home? Have you made a list of household duties (cooking, cleaning, yard)? Will you raise your children in a religious environment?