Single parent dating tips kids
Our failure to let them risk may explain why so many young adults, between the ages of 22 and 35 still live at home or haven’t started their careers, or had a serious relationship.
Normal risk taking at fourteen or fifteen would have prepared them for such decisions and the risks of moving away from home, launching a career or getting married. Staff from four universities recently told me they encountered students who had never filled out a form or an application in their life.
Recently, I read about a father, Paul Wallich, who built a camera-mounted drone helicopter to follow his grade-school-aged son to the bus stop. This “safety first” preoccupation emerged over thirty years ago with the Tylenol scare and with children’s faces appearing on milk cartons. So we put knee-pads, safety belts and helmets on them…at the dinner table. Yet, has the world become that much more dangerous? But our society has created pervasive fears about letting kids be independent—and the consequences for our kids are serious.” Unfortunately, over-protecting our young people has had an adverse effect on them.
Author Gever Tulley suggests, “If you’re over 30, you probably walked to school, played on the monkey bars, and learned to high-dive at the public pool.They’re cocky, but deep down their confidence is hollow, because it’s built off of watching You Tube videos, and perhaps not achieving something meaningful.According to a study by University College London, risk-taking behavior peeks during adolescence. They must test boundaries, values and find their identity during these years.Teens are apt to take more risks than any other age group. This is when they must learn, via experience, the consequences of certain behaviors.
We live in a world that warns us of danger at every turn. The truth is, kids need to fall a few times to learn it is normal; teens likely need to break up with a boyfriend or girlfriend to appreciate the emotional maturity that lasting relationships require. Because parents have removed “risk” from children’s lives, psychologists are discovering a syndrome as they counsel teens: High Arrogance, Low Self-Esteem.
If you’re younger, it’s unlikely you did any of these things.