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05-Jun-2016 20:34

You will find a grateful recipient at the final resting place of that correspondence. It was the 10th anniversary of my husband, Jay's death, which seems as inconceivable as I write this now as it did on that Saturday morning in January 1998.

So why is our biggest goal simply to fill up a notecard or piece of stationery with enough words to get the whole exercise over with?The next time you put pen to paper to express your sympathy, focus on a simple story, recollections of a brief encounter, a loving or funny memory.A few years ago I tentatively dug into the boxes with a strange mix of curiosity and apprehension.The man I was dating at the time agreed to sort through and organize them with me.

Because of the public nature of my job, I received many letters from total strangers.

But I also asked those attending Jay's funeral to write the girls so they would at least get to know their father posthumously.